How do you watch someone die right in front of you?

A morbid topic, I know.  It's just that death (and life) is around us all the time.  We see it on the news, or read it in the obituary column.  What I'm talking about is the death of a loved one, as this has been happening in my close circles these last few weeks.  And I've grieved.  And I continue to grieve.  These people leave behind their families and friends.  They leave behind the day-to-day happenings of what's to eat for breakfast, how long their commutes are, and what conversations lie waiting upon their return to home. 

At the same time this was all happening, I had just finished reading the book, one thousand gifts, by Ann Voskamp.  As a 6 year old child, Ann witnesses her 4 year old sister die instantly after being run over by a tractor.  She watched her mom holding her sister in her arms, while wailing in disbelief.  Ultimately, this woman grew up feeling such despair and depression.  A friend challenged her to write a thousand things that she is grateful for.  This led  her to see blessings abound, even when faced with something as painful as watching someone right in front of her die.  When her 6 children are fighting,  when she feels like she cannot bear to think about going on for another moment in time, Ann has embraced the notion that she always has a choice as to how she lives each moment.  She chooses grace.

From Ann Voskamp, I've taken the following quotes to make my life feel more blessed:

• "I have learned how to be content with whatever I have.  I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything.  I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little." 
• "Through all that haste I thought I was making up time.  Turns out, I was throwing it away.   The hurry makes us hurt.  Hurry always empties the soul."

Look for the blessing.  Look for the blessing.  These moments go by so quickly.  I know, because I was just realizing how I hadn't been reading to my children as I had done so often when they were little.  I had been living like the days were long, but then realized that the years are so very short.  So I found my way back to their bedroom, reading with such love pouring from my soul.  And as I grieve my friend's death, I can look to the blessing of the moment.  I can feel grateful for tears and the ability to cry.  I can feel grateful for the outpouring of love that helps to build community.  I can feel grateful for my breath and for this life where I can choose how to react and how to LIVE. 

I wish that sometimes I could sit all of my clients, past and present in the same room.  This way, they could see that whatever their pain, whatever their challenge, someone next to them has gone through something, although not exactly the same, but same enough to recognize the feelings shared mirror their own.  Now THAT is a blessing.  I love helping people move through their pain, where they don't have to feel alone in it.  They have to be ready and open for this process to occur.   Ann Voskamp, after many years, was open.  And the blessings began to flow. 

I want that for you. 

~Lisa